MY how things have changed.

This is something I found on my computer from May and I thought I would share it with you. Enjoy and feel free to comment.

May 27, 2008 12:13am

Another Sleepless Night.

“I’ve realized that in life you can’t wait for other people to make decisions that effect your life. You have to take charge and make those decisions for yourself.”

“Let go of the past. It happened. It was great. Now it’s done. Look for new, exciting things in the future.”

“Be independent. Sometimes you can’t trust your closest friends to be there, but the one person you can trust is yourself.”

“Why gossip? What’s the point? It’s a waste of time and energy.”

“Don’t dream big, dream realistically.”

Things to do: Buy a typewriter.
Finish a Story.
Leave New Orleans.

Number One

My life has been a crazy whirlwind of IFs, ANDs, BUTs, && MAYBEs. I've never had a constant in my life. I'm not talking about constants like the earths gravitational pull either ((Zach Rau)). I mean one person you can confide everything in. I was that person for someone else, or at least it seemed like I was, and nothing good came from it. So now I ask myself is there really one person who can handle all of that?!

I have what people like to call "Oldest Child Syndrome" which means I like to take charge of things, solve and fix problems. If my friend has a problem, it will become my problem and I "but in" and try to fix it. Basically I get in the middle of things, which is not good. I feel that I'm doing the right thing, but that's who I am. You'd think that people would stop telling me important information, because they know what I would do with it, but they don't. It's like they want me to do something wrong just so they can be mad at me for that 24 hours or whatever. And when something good happens from me "butting in" I'm left feeling unappreciated. Nothing good comes from it. You live life, make mistakes, and learn from them. Well what happens if you keep making the same mistakes over, then what? Now what? What am I supposed to do?

OK. Follow me with this one. I've decided that life is like a snake shedding its skin. Try to keep up. You find a friend. Tell that person your life story spend almost every moment together, then eventually there will be nothing to talk about and everything they do will get on your nerves and you'll move on. Until you find another friend and you'll repeat the same pattern. Therefore, the only constant you can have in life is yourself and for the lucky ones, your family as well. So, I'll leave you with this quote.

"In this life, family is the most precious gift we are given, the most sacred. Turn your back on them and that is when you truly have nothing. "